10th Week Down

Hey everyone - well this week was... well it's over! I went to the doctor on Wednesday for my complete blood count. First draw, no good, dehydrated!! 2nd draw, ok. Then I had to wait a while & drink some disgusting sugar concoction, guess my electrolytes are low. Then I had a 3rd & a 4th draw. I was "the human pin cushion". What all this means is.. well it didn't look good, only because my counts aren't moving as fast as the Doc wants, so he increased my Chemo to be more aggressive. I take almost double what I was taking before. I still have my "active days" and my "recovery days". So I went out with Midgee & Rufus to Red Robbin & a movie, (last meal, sort of thing..) Rufus is moving to Alaska for the summer & I'll miss her terribly!! (thanks for the early Bday, I love all of it!!xox) This Thursday was my first day of AGGRESSIVE Chemo!! It was very AGGRESSIVE! I was very much a bathroom fixture! When Andy got home that evening, I couldn't even focus on him, he kept asking me what was wrong. Oh well. Friday morning was pretty much the same as Thursday. Towards the afternoon, I was just dizzy & tired. Saturday was such a pretty day outside again, when Andy got home from work he mowed the lawn, so I sat in the swing in the sunshine. Felt nice, but I didn't feel well enough to pull weeds or sweep up. We tried watching a movie, but I couldn't keep my eyes open. Today, Andy had to work AGAIN and the kids were at their others, so I was missing all of them! I felt pretty normal today. What I've noticed & most of you probably have too, is that I forget ALOT! I ask the same questions over and over, and as soon as the answer is about to be given, I almost remember that I've asked it before, almost. It's driving me nuts.. Oh, the Doc did say that this stronger dose of Chemo might give me the munchies.. He was right, I've wanted to eat & eat, problem is, I still can't get much of any substance down. We found out that Wendy's fast food place now serves STRAWBERRY shakes & that OREO has a Limited Edition of STRAWBERRY Oreo's!! Andy bought me some STRAWBERRY applesauce, Yummy! Well, 10th week down. Tomorrow will be a great day! Susan thanks for the shake!! Tara thanks for the Jello! I read my comments from last week & I just have to say, THANK YOU ALL!! You don't know what it means to me to know that you care enough to want to keep up on this "thing" we're going through. Lacey, I almost forgot to blog tonight, but Andy reminded me & I'm glad because I read your comment, & I don't want you to stay up all night waiting!! xo Jan & Celest it was so good to hear from you girls!! I love you! Celest what's new with you?? Niki, me, STUBBORN??? Well I never!! Teasing, don't be scared. I love you girl. Oh in case any of you were wondering, yes my real name is WonTon Ubangee Rae Fullmer, (thanks for telling everyone Angela xoxox (my SIS)) Ang (sis in law) you're the only retard, I did this WHOLE BLOG, duh!! I love you! Karie I didn't call you, I need to know whats up.. xox Thanks to all of you for your kind words & for thinking of me & my family. I love you all -
Kira L. , thanks for the "Pro" comment, hmm I need to come up with a cool name, like Poison Girl, and my super power can be, projectile vomiting... That's just wrong, I'll keep working on it. Tune in next Sunday for adventures with Poison girl. :) Tona

9th Week DOWN!

Hello :) It's Sunday!! I love Sundays! Thanks everyone for everything again this week! There's really nothing new to say this week, I guess that's good. However, I do want to thank some of you individually - Jenny, thanks for the delicious chocolate covered Strawberries!! I did share them, can you believe it?? It was so good to talk to you & thanks for posting on my blog. Karie, don't feel dumb cause you don't come over. STOP IT! I love talking to you girl! You're as outspoken & sarcastic as I am, I love it!! You are so awesome! I can't figure out the picture thing, I'll call you this week. Momma Leisa - You are one of a kind! I call to check on you (even though I hate the phone) & you still get me! Yummy tato's :) I absolutely love you!! Susan & Nikki it was so fun on our "girls night out" Wednesday. I love hanging with you girls! Who's in charge next time?? Tara thanks for dinner, and for sitting & talking with me. I love our talks. My sis Angela - YOU FINALLY POSTED!! I love you lady!! I miss you. My Mom & Dad came to visit me today!! I haven't seen them since FOREVER!! It felt so wonderful to get a hug from you both. I'm glad you're both feeling better & I hope another motorcycle comes up on KSL in this area so you'll visit... :) Midgee thanks for calling & texting me to make sure I'm still kicking. Love you. Thanks to all of you for your prayers & fasts. I think I'm actually getting used to all this Chemo, I've got it down so I know when & what time of day my BAD times are. I hope I didn't jinx myself.. I'll write a quick update after my blood draw this week. I love you all. Keep smiling, we're almost done!!

8 Weeks Down - 2 MONTHS!

Hi y'all! Wow I can't believe I've conquered 2 MONTHS of Chemo... I can finally see the end. (of chemo, not the "END" :) ) Ok, updates for this weeks course.. Thursday, my bad day!! Could hardly stand being alone that day. I don't know why, but sometimes, as long as there's someone in the room, I feel better. Midgee came over after work because she called to see how I was doing & I broke down in tears. I tried to tell her she didn't need to come over, but she came anyways. Persistent little POOP (I've taught you well..) I'm so glad she came over. Lifted my spirits. Friday I was very off balance & SICK!! Yup, visited the porcelain idol again!! Tara brought us Chili & jello jigglers Yummy. I "rented" that meal, but it sure was tasty going down. Saturday - We went to a baptism, it felt good to be in the chapel. Haven't been to church since before starting Chemo. It was a beautiful day, sun shining, warmth on my face. Made me forget for a minute that WE are all going through this. Susan brought us taco salad & STRAWBERRY ice cream (and mint cookies, but I hid those- I'm not sharing :) )! Normally I can eat salad, but not this time. (makes me so angry, because I never know what I'll be able to stomach) Sunday, no issues, except I'm TIRED. But who isn't. Went to Ang's for a birthday party for the girls. It was good to see Andy's family. Then Andy took me for a drive, not to get rid of me, just to get me out of the house.. I've gotten snappy with a few of you (Megg & Andy) sorry, I'm just tired of being tired & sick of being sick. I complain that laundry isn't done & the kitchen is a mess, then I get mad because I'm cleaning it up.. I know that's frustrating to my family. Just a reminder, I still have O.C.D!! Andy said I should mention besides the Chemo, what happens during all of this. I get a CBC (complete blood count) done ever so often. They're trying to get my red cell count up & my white cell count down. I'm anemic, my immune system is low, my eyelashes are falling out (I haven't lost any hair on my head for 2 weeks now!!) The steroids I'm on make me swollen. The other one for non duplication of my DNA (or something like that) makes my skin crawl!! Basically, I'm sick & tired all the time. We have until middle of June on this course of Chemo. Then we'll see. Thanks for all that you do to keep me positive. I'll catch you up next Sunday. My love to you all, Tona

Thursday the? Don't know the date...

Hi everyone, it's Thursday. 1st day of Chemo this week. I had a "spare" moment & thought I'd read some bloggs.. You guys ROCK! Thanks for all of your support. I love you all. I came down stairs to get some MORE apple juice, can't seem to get enough of that stuff.. Andy just got called to an old folks home, service call. Meggen is studying @ a friends house for ACT's on Saturday & the little kids will be here again on Saturday.. Anyways, I'm getting tired now, but I'll post again on Sunday. Uncle Buddy- you can come visit us anytime you want, you know you're always welcome! (as long as your not sick, but I know you know that) Mom's right, I hate talking on the phone.. Lacey- it's only 90 min from your house...Midgee, I love you! Thanks for the "BFF sick woobie" Karie you're the cutest!! I love your guts out! I get so excited to read your blogs. Kira (daughter of Karie, who also visits DRC & DRT's office) Duh, I know who you are!! I love you girl. And all of you that have sent me emails, your kind words really do wonders!! Mom, I set you up a blogger account, you have no excuse, I know you're reading this... Love you & dad so much..
THANK YOU ALL!! WE WILL OVERCOME!!! Together, xoxoxox Tona

7 Weeks Down

Hi, down another week! Thursday was my bad day - Andy worked & Meggen was in school like usual, but Thomas & Taylor were here for Spring break. Thomas watched movies with me & Taylor kept asking if I was going to be ok? Talked to my mom later in the afternoon. It was good to hear her voice. : ) Friday wasn't the best either, Taylor called Grandpa Fullmer to see if he wanted to take them to lunch @ McDonalds.. (I tried to pay, but he wouldn't take it) when they left I slept & vomited, pretty normal. Susan brought over home made rolls (Taylor's favorite!) & jello (yummy) Georgette brought us pizza & bread sticks - I think Thomas could live off of that!! & a STRAWBERRY shake for me... I know this is going to shock some of you, but, I'm not into chocolate anymore!! It's all about the STRAWBERRY!! Saturday Andy & Megg both worked & Taylor played with the Bishops daughter. Thomas was my hang out buddy again. It was such a sunny day, that we went out in the yard. We pulled some weeds out of the flower bed & herb garden. I got tired & sat in the sun awhile. Thomas pruned the rose bushes. He was such a big help, never complained once. We tried to get the lawn mower out, but between Thomas & myself, we couldn't get it out of the garage. I seem to have lost some of my super hero abilities as well..haha Andy got home & started grilling steaks - smelled good, but there's no way I could have gotten that down. He made me a salad, oddly enough I can keep that down. Nikki brought over homemade Chicken pot pie! Yummy, I was able to eat a piece & it stayed down! And she brought STRAWBERRY icecream.. You guys know me so well.. I felt terrible, because apparently I was told she was bringing dinner for us & I completely forgot!! I blame it on the Chemo!! I'm forgetting a lot of things, which would normally drive me nuts, however, since I can't remember I've forgotten it, it doesn't seem to bother me too badly... I think I wore myself out on Saturday, maybe over did it just a touch.. Sunday's here, not much of an appetite, I'm just so tired... nothing new, I know. I'm having one of those emotional days. Feeling useless, a burden, ugly, swollen & balding! Ugggg I can't wait to be done with all of this. I'm doing the woe is me, sorry. General Conference was good, what I saw of it.. I taped it so I could REALLY watch it when I'm not so dopey & sleepy. So maybe I'll watch it towards the end of June.. LOL Andy is making peach cobbler, because I said it sounded good. Any time I say something sounds good, or that I might be able to eat something, he jumps on it, & poof, it's here! He's been great! He's been my timekeeper on when I take my RX's. He'll call when he's at work & tell me which one to take. I felt really bad this weekend because he's had a cold, yet I still needed his help. That, I think, has been the hardest, because I'm usually the one who takes care of him & the kids.. Like most of us moms. But he assures me that he loves me & he'll take care of me through eternity!! I think I'll hold him to it. Seems like Sunday evening meds are the hardest to stay on time with. We sort of go in to the "whew, we're over another week" mode, yet the week doesn't end until I go to sleep for the night.. So, here I sit & type to let you know what went on this weekend (nothing new) but I'm waiting to take my last dose of Chemo, see we lost track of time again, now I have to wait until 9 PM to take it.. I haven't had a terrible time with my last dose on Sundays (as in I don't worship the porcelain idol as often) I don't PLAN on anything however, because it seems as soon I ASSume I've got a schedule & routine down, it throws me through a loop.. So, we'll just say, I hope I'll be snoozing by 9:30!! Monday morning work comes around very early!! I am still going to work Monday-Wednesday. Wow, I bet you never thought you'd get so many details about my life... that'll teach you.. Log on next Sunday for exciting new details of my life on poison.. Keep smiling. Good night & I love you all, xoxo Tona

FINALLY!

OH MY GOODNESS!! It only took me all night (and Andy's help) but yeah!! It's done, it's figured out. I'm worn out!! Ok so yes, you are at the right place if you're reading this. I'm so excited! I hope everyone got my email. If you know of someone who might want to read the blogs, please pass the link on. Marylou I don't have Amanda's or Jared's emails and so on. Mom I don't have Uncle Buddy's or Terri's & not sure if Aunt Rena's is correct. Anyways, I'll post more on Sunday. Love you all , Tona xoxo

April 2, 2008

Alright eveyone!! I know this isn't the right way to blog on this space, but until my sister in law (Marjorie) figures it out & then explains it to me step by step (I'm kind of direction impaired!!) we'll just do it this way..
So, tomorrow starts my 7th week!! So far I still have "some" hair!! It's just short & for me, VERY thin!! This week was my hardest yet! Not the Chemo days (that starts tomorrow) but my recovery days! I couldn't seem to shake the dizzy, sleepy feeling this time. I haven't had any energy Monday, Tuesday or today. I could hardly keep my eyes open at work. I felt like my skin was crawling away, very irritating! DrC was very nice & concerned, but for a minute there I thought he was telling me that I needed to quit. He said he wasn't & was just worried about me, so whew!! I am still employed, for the time being.. Just teasing, DrC & everyone @ work have been so helpful! As well as my friends, neighbors & Family! I love you all. I really do!
I joke alot about my chemo TX because it makes it less "real". I'm trying to be positive about it all, and figure out what I'm supposed to learn from this trial. I know one thing, it's to be a better friend. To all of you that have felt forgotten, I'm sorry. I hope you know that I'm just not a phone talker & when I have time, I actually like to stay home. I'm sorry. I want to be there for all of you. I promise I'll try harder. Well, I'll sign out for now, but I'll try to write an "update" on Sunday. Love you all, Tona